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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26979952">Civil Heart</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDemonLedger/pseuds/TheDemonLedger'>TheDemonLedger</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Civil Heart [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Canon-Typical Violence, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, Dom Bucky Barnes, Domestic Fluff, Explicit Sexual Content, Light Dom/sub, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Male Slash, Not Canon Compliant, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Polyamory, Porn With Plot, Relationships Are Spoilers, Romance, Sad, Series, Smut, Spoilers, Sub Tony Stark, Switch Steve Rogers, Tags Are Hard, Tags Contain Spoilers, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 22:02:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>18,169</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26979952</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDemonLedger/pseuds/TheDemonLedger</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>For the first time since waking up from the ice five years ago, Steve is happy and content and in love. But with Bucky in his head, the newly introduced Sokovia Accords, and some threat that Steve simply can’t quantify, he feels like he’s running out of time. All he wants is to be in this liminal space with Tony Stark, but when push comes to shove, he may have to sacrifice everything to follow through on his promise to stay with Bucky “‘til the end of the line”.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Civil Heart [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1968985</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>31</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Thanks for reading, enjoy the story, and scope the chapter notes at the beginning. Heads up, the relationship tags are spoilers, but I didn’t want to blindside anyone.</p>
    </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey folks! <br/>I posted this story almost a year ago, but it wasn't receiving the type of feedback I was looking for, so I pulled it down and have spent six months working on it. I have an outline, a ton of writing, and I'm so looking forward to sharing this with all of you. <br/>This is my first published MCU fic (hopefully one of many). Due to the contention between Team Tony and Team Steve, I have turned on comment moderation. Anything that's directly disrespectful and not constructive to me, my writing, the actors, or the characters will not be tolerated. I appreciate constructive criticism, but I do not appreciate blatant hate for no reason. <br/>Thank you so much for reading, and for understanding. I look forward to sharing with you in the future!!!! xoxo Ollie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>	Even though he wished it had been the soft light of the morning which had woken them, the snap of the alarm on their bedside was what startled Steve awake enough to jolt the man sleeping against him. Bodies clinging, he reached blindly out to stop the blaring sound. He was unsuccessful enough in his attempts that, squinting, Tony reached over and pulled the watch off the nightstand. Smacking his mouth against a yawn and blinking blearily, he tapped the screen a few times and the sound cut out. They were awake now, though that didn’t seem to stop Tony from tossing the watch onto the other side of the bed in favor of nuzzling closer to Steve. With a grunt and a sigh, Steve wrapped his arms more firmly around his companion and began tracing lazy circles on Tony’s naked back. </p>
<p>	“Mm,” Tony murmured – Steve could feel his lips curl against the juncture of his neck and shoulder, “if you keep doing that, I’ll forget why I set an alarm.” </p>
<p>	Chuckling, Steve continued his action, moving lower and lower. “You’ve already forgotten,” Steve whispered as Tony raised his head. Half-lidded eyes stared back at him, irises shadowed by pupils which grew large with arousal. </p>
<p>	“You know me so well,” Tony replied teasingly. He lowered onto his elbows, arms framing Steve’s head as he pressed a wet kiss to Steve’s mouth. “You do know how to wake me up, though.” A growl escaped Steve at the thought, and in one fluid motion, Tony was laying on his back with Steve hovering over him, gasping. </p>
<p>	“I like you best in the morning,” Steve teased, shifting above him, balanced on his hands and keeping Tony locked in beneath him. “You haven’t had time to come up with anything snarky yet.” Eyes roving, his expression softened at the way Tony reached for him impatiently, avoiding his lips in favor of his forehead. They stayed like this, with Steve’s body settling between Tony’s legs, knocking his knees apart as his eyes got darker. Steve’s hand trailed down the side of Tony’s face. Using one finger, he tipped Tony’s head, exposing the smooth plane of his neck.</p>
<p>	“Fuck,” said Tony hoarsly. Uneven breathing not the only sign of arousal on Tony, Steve chuckled as he dipped down to kiss across the willingly exposed plane of Tony’s neck and stubbled jaw, down to his collarbone. Breaths of kisses ghosted across Tony’s shoulder and onto his chest as Steve moved lower. Steve hummed as Tony whined for closeness. </p>
<p>	“Yeah?” Steve muttered as Tony pushed on his shoulders but pulled on his hair, indecisive and rough. “What do you want?” </p>
<p>	“I–” Tony gasped, watching Steve as his fingers trailed further down, getting closer and closer to his hard cock, the tip of which was already beading with precum. His head fell back against the pillow as one of Steve’s calloused, long-fingered hands wrapped around him and gave a firm pull. The moan that tore from Tony was loud, made louder by Steve’s mouth wrapping languidly around his tip. “Holy–” </p>
<p>	Steve’s hand worked at the base while his mouth worked over the rest of Tony’s dick, drawing soft, pleasant sounds out of him. As Tony grew closer, his hands and movements grew more erratic; his fingers clutched, his nails scratching gently against Steve’s scalp; his hips bucked faintly upwards. Knowing he was close, Steve held him down and worked him a little rougher— </p>
<p>Then, a knock at the door, soft and complacent and obviously well intentioned. Wide-eyed, Steve sat up and wiped his mouth. One glance at Tony told him the moment was ruined. The way Tony’s arms fell over his face and a steady but quiet grumble emptied out of him was enough. </p>
<p>	Rolling his eyes, he clambered out of bed and scooped a pair of sweatpants off the floor, wrangled them over his legs while trying to make his way quickly to the door. He stopped only long enough to shift his erection to a less conspicuous position in his loose fitting pants; how well it worked, he wasn’t sure, but it was at least an effort. </p>
<p>“Who is it?” Steve called on his way, trying to catch his breath. </p>
<p>	“It’s Nat,” came Natasha’s voice.</p>
<p>	Steve swiped a hand across his face, pausing with his other hand on the doorknob.  “Can you come back?” Steve asked, flashing a grimace back at Tony. He wasn’t looking, just staring at the ceiling with the sheet pulled up to his chin, face crimson – as a side-effect of exertion, or out of embarrassment, he wasn’t sure. </p>
<p>	A brief pause met his question. </p>
<p>“I could,” said Nat, voice tense, “but I’m looking for Tony. He’s supposed to be in a meeting soon.” When she paused again, Steve could picture exactly the nonchalant look that crossed her face as she tried not to sound suspicious. “Vision told me to check here.” </p>
<p>The sound of Tony sucking air through his teeth almost made Steve laugh. Instead, he opened the door just enough to see Nat and for Nat to see him. Knowing his expression was one of undisguised impatience, he tried to hide it with a thin-lipped smile. </p>
<p>“Did I wake you?” Nat asked with a cocky grin. Her eyes trailed from his face, down his bare torso and locked on the waistband on his sweats. When she looked back up, a hint of mischief flashed in her eyes. She tapped a single finger to a spot on her neck just above the collar bone. Steve clapped a hand to his neck on the same spot. The self-satisfied smirk she had was enough to let him know he'd been caught out. “Guess not. Lemme see, then.” </p>
<p>Incredulous at her brazen attitude, he gave another quick glance back at Tony, who – while still staring at the ceiling – looked as though he was somewhere between laughter and tears. Meeting Nat’s gaze once more, she waved her hand for him to hurry up. When he did nothing, she pushed past him and into the room, a laugh catching on its way out of her mouth. </p>
<p>“Oh!” Nat cried out in upplayed shock. “Tony, I wasn’t expecting you here.” Steve followed her quickly, and was met by the nearly picture-perfect image of Tony lying on his side, sheet draped delicately over his thin frame. A pleased chuckle from Steve followed Natasha’s half-laugh as she leaned against the wall between the two men. When she spoke again, however, it was with a more serious tone. “You scheduled us all for a meeting this morning with Vision, and then Doctor Cho right after.” She cleared her throat. “We’re just wondering if you’re going to be <em>ready</em> soon.” </p>
<p>“Why didn’t Vision just come to get us?” asked Steve suspiciously. </p>
<p>“He said he would,” Nat replied, turning so her back was pressed against the wall. “Except he thought it possible you were otherwise occupied.” </p>
<p>“And you just happened to volunteer your time?” replied Tony sarcastically. </p>
<p>“Yup.” She bounced away from the wall, moving back toward the door. There was something about the way she moved, her constant energy and spontaneous action that made Steve comfortable, even in a weird, awkward situation like this. “So, what do you want me to say?” </p>
<p>“Honestly,” Tony said, pulling the sheet tighter as he moved to sit up, “I completely forgot, but I can be out there in about twenty minutes. Is there coffee?” </p>
<p>“For you, beautiful, always,” Nat said with a wink. Breezing past Steve, she squeezed his bicep gently and gave him a significant glance. “I’ll keep your dirty little secret, but I expect details later, Rogers.” </p>
<p>“Please go away,” Steve said, ushering her from the room and closing the door behind her. When he turned back, Tony was already collecting his clothes from the floor. “She has no sense of personal space.” </p>
<p>“At least she’s funny,” Tony replied with a chuckle. Feeling anxious, Steve began to pick up some of their clothes as well. “Rhodey can sometimes be like that, but he’s so– I don’t know.” </p>
<p>“Rhodey?” Steve finished with a chuckle. Both men nodded, meeting in the middle of the room where one final piece of clothing lay: Tony’s boxers, which were white and covered in small shields resembling the one Steve sometimes carried. “Did you have to buy the Captain America boxers?” </p>
<p>“Gotta represent,” Tony said as he leaned down to pluck them off the floor. Pressing onto the balls of his feet, he gave Steve a chaste kiss which he pulled away from quickly, avoiding getting caught in Steve’s arms. “I have to go to this meeting.” His tone was apologetic as he backed toward the bathroom. There was a pause, pregnant with unsaid words, which neither of them knew how to fill. As he paused before entering the bathroom, a sock fell to the ground. It made a soft thunk, which both sets of eyes flocked to, eliciting a soft round of chuckles. </p>
<p>“Was it at least a nice morning?” Steve asked as he stooped to pick up the stray sock. Tony nodded, grinning. </p>
<p>“It was very nice,” he murmured as Steve began to step closer to him. Lips twisting from smile to defiance, he gathered his clothes tighter to his chest and pointed one finger at Steve. “You better not.” </p>
<p>“I can’t even kiss you goodbye?” asked Steve with a pout, linking his fingers through Tony’s free hand to pull him closer. </p>
<p>“No,” Tony said, even as he let Steve wrap him in his arms and brought his face close in, he held back, hesitating to press his lips to Steve’s. “Because if you do I’ll want to stay and then we’ll never get any work done.” Steve smiled and kissed him anyway, long and slow and filled with unspoken promises. </p>
<p>“You better come back here,” Steve whispered with a chuckle when they finally parted.  </p>
<p>“I’ll always keep coming back,” replied Tony quietly; Steve watched as his entire disposition softened, and for a second, Tony’s walls dropped. They’d been together long enough for it to have happened a few times. Tony would let him in, Steve would let Tony in. The longer they were together, the more time they spent, the more common it became. Still, it surprised Steve every time it happened, because somehow, he’d expected it all to end so long ago, that it stirred something in him. Something that Steve was positive he would never admit aloud. “Anyway, I should–” </p>
<p>“Yeah,” Steve cut across, relieved that Tony broke the silence between them first. Ducking his head, Tony opened the door and stepped into the bathroom with one last fleeting look back at Steve. As the door shut, Steve moved to start dressing for his day, and made himself promise that any feelings greater than what they’d already shared aloud would be private. Only for Steve. </p>
<p>#</p>
<p>	Time passed slowly, as it always did for Steve when Tony’s vibrant exuberance didn’t fill the room. Twenty minutes turned into half an hour, and finally, forty-five minutes – and twenty-eight pages of Steve’s new book – later, Tony was calling them into the conference room. The projector was already going, the wall displayed from floor to ceiling with news broadcasts, articles, and imagery of Sokovia. Eyes flashing between the screen and Tony, Steve had to bite back the question that sprung to his lips. Instead, he sat himself across from Natasha, who flickered her eyes to Tony and back to Steve. She stuck her tongue out at him as he gently kicked her beneath the table. </p>
<p>	The meeting started out boring, with Tony entirely ignoring the changing scenery behind him. Steve wasn’t sure if his boredom was due more to the fact that he’d already heard everything Tony was saying, or because distantly, Steve was still between the sheets with him. Either way, the longer Tony talked at them, the more Steve felt that singular sarcastic influence rubbing off on him. This was reflected in the way Nat watched him, how her lips curled in silent amusement. It was only when Tony opened the floor for conversation that Steve was able to sit up, returning to his normal, serious state. </p>
<p>	“So,” Tony started, glancing around. The table was filled with the usual team, though with the obvious absences of Bruce and Clint. His eyes lingered just a half-second too long on Steve before they moved onto the next person. For anyone else, it would have been a prompt to speak; for Steve, the look curled in his belly and tightened in his jeans. “I’m sure you’ve all noticed this.” Tony gestured to the display behind him, eliciting a few murmured assents. </p>
<p>	“What’s the point?” Wanda asked, waving vaguely at the projection. “Make us feel worse? We already feel bad, Tony, there is no need–” </p>
<p>	“No,” Tony said quickly, cutting across her. “No, I’m sorry. Maybe I should have explained sooner.” The look Tony shot at Steve was clearly pleading, but it was Nat who spoke up next. </p>
<p>	“We’re doing all we can, so I guess I’m with Wanda. What’s the point of showing us what we all lived through?” Face falling in despair at the lack of understanding from his team, Tony swivelled to the imagery, which moved as he waved his hand over it. As the pictures separated, making room in the center, he gestured for Vision to join him. Steve watched with calculated interest as Tony, typically all words and no preparation, seemed to hesitate. Catching Nat’s eye, they both frowned at each other, questioning what could possibly be going through his mind. </p>
<p>	“I have a proposition to make you all,” Tony said after a moment of muttering to Vision. The team waited quietly while Tony seemingly stewed over his next words. Steve, suspicious, crossed his arms over his chest and slid further down in his chair. “I want to do something big for them. For the people who we– who Ultron displaced, but I’m not sure what yet.” It seemed to take a lot of doing for Tony to admit to the next part. “So I’d like some help.” </p>
<p>	Rhodes chuckled from behind Steve, who glanced at him with a smirk. </p>
<p>	“Our help?” asked Rhodes with a sigh. The position he sat in was nearly identical to that of Steve’s – though he assumed it was more for comfort and less to keep from lunging across the room to finish what had been so rudely interrupted that morning. “You never need our help. Why now?” The sound of Rhodes' voice reminded Steve of exactly where he was, and he made a valiant effort to make his face expressionless. </p>
<p>	“Look–” Tony started.</p>
<p>	“Rhodes brings up a good point,” Steve said, playing devil’s advocate. He needed to say something; it would look weird to not say anything. “You’re usually so good at planning these things on your own. Why us?” </p>
<p>	“Statistically speaking, Tony, it would be easier to control the variables if it was only you introducing them,” Vision said softly. The sentence threw Steve into the past, to a short and sharp conversation between he and Tony that he doubted either would ever forget. Something had shifted within Tony after that, which was simultaneously quantifiable and unspoken. It had taken weeks for Steve to notice it, but Tony’s attitude toward teamwork, cooperation, even asking for help had changed. Not dramatically, not even enough for anyone other than Steve to notice. It was the thing that made Steve– well, it made the pair work, anyhow. </p>
<p>	“That’s–” Tony stuttered, waving away Vision’s interjection. The look he cast at Steve told him they were remembering the same moment. “That’s not the point. The point is that I want everyone to get some credit in righting our wrongs. Just go with me here.” </p>
<p>	The room fell silent, which was enough for Tony to start explaining. Steve watched him talk, only half listening. This wasn’t anything he’d heard before, but he’d also never seen Tony this desperate to make the team understand. The way he moved, the push and pull of his motions, it was all driving home that same point: his mistake wasn’t their mistake, and he would take the fall, but he wanted to share the success. It was an oddly out of character sentiment, though every time he glanced at Steve he could tell it was an effort made, maybe not because of him, but in spite of the judgment cast all those months ago. </p>
<p>	“So…” Nat said, trailing off. She twined a piece of her long hair around one finger; Steve could hear in her sardonic tone how close she was to anger. There was no better time than now to step in, but part of Steve wanted to see Tony own it his request. “You want us to fix your fuck up for you, is that what you’re asking?” </p>
<p>	“I think,” Steve said, deciding quickly that Nat’s language was too vitriolic for polite conversation, “what Tony is saying is that it’s easy for the world to blame all of us and for Stark Industries to step in with an aid team and a big check and sweep up the mess.” Tony nodded enthusiastically, opening his mouth to speak. Raising one finger, Steve waited for him to subdue his excitement so he could continue on. “It’s important for all of us to try to move forward from this. Ultron was Tony, sure, but we’re a team. That means we come together and do what’s right.” </p>
<p>	“Well gee, Cap,” Nat bit out. “Thanks for the pep talk.” </p>
<p>	“Hey,” Steve reprimanded, pointing an accusing finger at her. “Attitude.” Nat made a face and sat back in her chair, her arms crossing tightly. </p>
<p>	“I think that Steve is right,” Vision said, floating over to sit beside Wanda once more. Sam nodded just ahead of Steve in agreement, and the conversation died there. Closing down the projection, Tony threw a thankful look at Steve, who smiled – albeit a little sadly. Without waiting for the room to clear out, Steve stood and began to walk slowly toward the door. Hip checking him, Nat sidled past him as she grabbed his hand and pulled him faster out into the hall. It was a relief as she drew him from that space, since it was taking everything in his body not to turn and stare as Tony bent over to call Helen. </p>
<p>	“You’re an ass,” she whispered, nudging him in the side. </p>
<p>	“Okay,” Steve acquiesced. “But what does that make you?” </p>
<p>	“I’m a saint,” Nat said with a laugh. “Obviously.” She rolled her eyes at his overenthusiastic chuckle, linking her arm through his as she pulled him to the stairs. The world outside still looked bright and blue, and Steve had decided long ago that it was easier to follow Nat wherever she pulled him rather than argue about their destination. Glancing at her, he noticed the quirk of her lips and resigned himself for further snark. </p>
<p>	“What?” he asked. </p>
<p>	“Oh, nothing,” she drawled, sucking air through her teeth. “Just thinking how it’s lucky Tony doesn’t call meetings very often. If you’d stared at his dick much longer–” </p>
<p>	“Natasha–” Steve warned, trying to draw away from her. She only clung tighter, though the volume of her speech softened.  </p>
<p>	“–it might have grown three sizes all on it’s own,” she finished over his outburst. “Though you’d know all about that, wouldn’t you?” Tracking her eyes to his face, she popped her lips and raced away, making it to the stairs long before he had a chance to catch her. Silently cursing her dexterity, he followed lightly in her wake, maintaining the same unamused expression all the while. The teasing was fine – the teasing was expected, especially from Natasha. It didn’t bother Steve, especially as innocuous as it was; that didn’t mean he couldn’t tease back. She scrunched her nose at him as she glanced quickly back before meeting the stairs, pulling a real laugh from the back of his throat. </p>
<p>	Nat trotted down the stairs ahead of Steve at a pace just faster than his. This meant, of course, that she reached the door exiting out into the empty promenade before he did. With a little bow, she pulled the door wide for him; smirking, he let her usher him out. No one had followed them into the balmy late-April sun. The weather had been so spotty lately, Steve didn’t necessarily blame them. Still, the absence of others left the track free for them to walk together at a leisurely pace. After spending nearly a month straight in her company while Steve searched for Bucky, he’d found that he had more in common with Natasha than he’d initially suspected. It comforted him to know that there was another person on this earth who was willing to go as far as they had to in order to find what they were searching for. True, Nat had never offered up any hint of what she was yearning, but Steve had never asked. If she wanted to share or tell him where she’d disappeared to, he was positive she would. No matter it had been nearly a year since her return from that mysterious somewhere. Wishing he knew better where her mind was sometimes was a fool's errand – it didn’t always stop him from hoping, though. </p>
<p>	They’d already walked once around the track before Natasha finally spoke up. Steve didn’t dread her questions, just as he didn’t resent her sarcasm; it was the others he didn’t want to deal with quite yet. Those questions would be probing, suspicious, likely insincere. He just didn’t have the time for it. Something about the way Nat regarded him, with this playful ambivalence, however, made him certain that anything she asked would be just deep enough to glean the information she needed. </p>
<p>	“So, how long?” Nat asked, slipping her hand around the crook of Steve’s elbow to slow their stride. He hadn’t kept track, if he was being totally honest with himself. There was a part of him that was constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop – for Tony to realize he’d rather spend his nights with someone more exciting. Waiting for him to want better for himself than someone who’d claimed to hate him only weeks before they spent their first night together. The question stumped Steve, who had to count backwards in his head through the months, regaling himself with memories of bedrooms and hotels and early, early mornings in the nearly empty compound. </p>
<p>	The longer Steve thought about it, the further he had to go back. This in turn pushed upon him the realization that he’d spent more of the year with Tony than without. It wasn’t scary, but as soon as it hit him, Steve was reeling at the idea that nine months of his life had gone by and he hadn’t even noticed the time passing. The thought caught him off guard, and it took Nat nudging him in the side to pull him back to reality. </p>
<p>	“Uh,” he said with a chuckle. “Nine months.” 	</p>
<p>	“Nine months?!” Nat exclaimed, jumping away indignantly. </p>
<p>	Steve scratched his chin as he also paused, looking away and biting his lip, suddenly embarrassed. “Yeah.” </p>
<p>	“Nine months from now?” she asked, looking incredulous. </p>
<p>	“No, Nat, nine months from Labor Day,” he said, squinting past her at the field; he was abashed at the idea that so much could happen without him realizing how long it had been. Of course, his instant defense was sarcasm; between Tony and Nat, he was bound to catch it at some point. </p>
<p>	“Look, I’m just trying to get a clear picture of this.” Frowning, she set her fists firmly on her hips. “I thought we were friends. Why didn you tell me?” </p>
<p>	“I dunno.” Steve shrugged and continued to walk down the track, leaving Nat to catch up. “I didn’t think about it.” </p>
<p>	“You didn’t-” </p>
<p>	“You’re saying that like this is a big surprise. Two years ago you were trying to get me to hook up with any woman we worked with a S.H.I.E.L.D.,” Steve said sharply. </p>
<p>	“That was before I knew you were–” she stopped him in his tracks with a gentle hand on his forearm. He could practically see the cogs working in her head as she did the math. “Are you gay?” </p>
<p>	“No,” he replied quickly, then shrugged to cover his insecurity. “I don’t know. There have been women.” </p>
<p>Nat glanced at him and nodded her belief. It didn’t take long for the companionable silence to fall between them again, and soon they had made another lap. </p>
<p>“How many women?” Nat asked slyly, looping her arm through his. </p>
<p>“Jesus, Nat–” said Steve with a groan. “I don’t know, why does it matter?” He stopped them again, staring out at the treeline. The tips of the evergreens swayed in the light breeze and he felt relieved as she shrugged. </p>
<p>“It doesn’t, I was just curious if it was more than Peggy.” </p>
<p>“I- no,” he replied. </p>
<p>Nat nodded, then slowly continued forward around the track before starting through the field. Turning, she beckoned him forward, and he followed in her wake with hesitance. If he was being honest with himself, the last thing he wanted right now was to be interrogated by Natasha about his history with romance. It was complicated – too complicated for him to want to dive deep into, and his feelings for Tony just made it all the worse. Nat’s hand wound gently through the grass, and after confirming that it was dry, she sat and let her head fall back, exposing her neck and chest to the heat of the sun. </p>
<p>“Sit,” she insisted after Steve arrived. The grass was dry and warm, and the rays of sunlight felt good on his skin. Steve leaned back and watched the birds that fluttered over and around the trees in the distance, the way the light shifted on the grass from between the pines; it was peaceful out, which he needed now more than ever. </p>
<p>“How are you?” he asked Nat, glancing down to watch her. She shrugged in response and shook her hair over her shoulders. </p>
<p>“I’m tired, like usual. But don’t change the subject now,” she said, turning her body so she could lounge with her head resting on his thigh. Groaning, Steve let her brush her hair over his lap and adjust to comfort before catching her eye. “So you never looked at a lady before you met her?” </p>
<p>Shrugging, Steve glanced away. It felt awkward, even now and as close as they were, to discuss things like his love life with Natasha. Having been so closed off for so long, Steve wasn’t used to opening up anymore – especially in the suddenly vast absence of Bucky. </p>
<p>“I guess there was never much of a reason to,” he explained. “You know what I looked like before the war.” The feeling of Nat’s eyes on him was almost too much, so he continued quickly on. “I didn’t have time for that sort of thing, and the girls weren’t interested. So… I stopped looking.” </p>
<p>“There was no one?” pressed Nat. Steve could feel that she suspected more, so he just shrugged again and looked down. </p>
<p>“No, but he doesn’t matter now, does he?” replied Steve coolly. Rolling her eyes, Natasha sat up and pulled Steve with her. </p>
<p>“I’m starved, you wanna get some food?” she asked. Steve nodded and, together, they made their way back inside. </p>
<p>#</p>
<p>Shoes on the floor, Nat sat cross-legged on the counter behind Steve as he made himself a sandwich, eating her own in small bites. Steve was listening for signs that Tony’s meeting was over, but knew that meetings with Helen could go on for hours, especially when talking about Vision. With Bruce gone, Tony needed someone to bounce ideas off of, and Steve would never rush that. Still, sometimes his boredom won over his inner self-control. </p>
<p>“Did you-” Nat started to say, swallowing down the rest of her bite before continuing on, “-look through that file at all since we last talked about it?” </p>
<p>“Yeah, I did.” Steve set the knife he had in his hand down gently on the counter and picked up his sandwich. An indiscernible tension filled Steve as he turned to look at Nat again, meeting her eyes with hesitance. “I don’t know what else to say about it.” </p>
<p>“Neither do I,” she responded. Winding an arm around her legs, she pulled them to her chest; her toes curled against the counter as she rested her chin on her knees. Popping the last bite of bread in her mouth, she watched as Steve’s face glazed over. “Did you love him?” </p>
<p>Steve smiled, then frowned, a short laugh escaping him at the thought. “Yeah, well, I couldn’t help it. You might not know, but he was very charming back in the day.” </p>
<p>Nat laughed and jumped off the counter.  “I bet,” she replied as she leaned beside Steve against the kitchen’s island. “You don’t have to answer if this is too personal, but do you ever wonder what it would have been like if he hadn’t fallen from the train that day?” </p>
<p>A tightness filled Steve’s chest as he nodded. “Every day.” He sniffed and looked away. “There was a time where it was just the two of us, Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes against the world. He was always bigger and stronger than me, but… it sort of felt like all we had was each other.” </p>
<p>A quiet fell between the two at this, until Natasha cleared her throat. </p>
<p>“It must have been hard,” she whispered.</p>
<p>“Yeah,” said Steve. “It still is.” </p>
<p>“So,” Nat said, her voice trailing back into its usual light, teasing tone. “What about Tony?” </p>
<p>“What about him?” </p>
<p>“You’ve been together so long! What are those feelings?”  </p>
<p>“Well,” Steve murmured, glancing over his shoulder. “I don’t know. He can be a little… you know.” </p>
<p>Nat rolled her eyes. “Closed off? Shut down? Like the Bermuda triangle of emotions?” </p>
<p>“Well, sort of, yeah,” Steve said. He looked between his uneaten sandwich and Natasha before hurrying to speak again. “I mean, I think I love him, but you never know, right?” He chuckled at the incredulous look on Nat’s face as she shoved him playfully, and took a large bite of his own peanut butter sandwich. A few more rounds of ribbing from Nat got Steve really laughing, all thoughts of Bucky and the love they’d once shared nearly forgotten. By the time he retired to his bedroom, planning to read until Tony returned, he felt lighter about the whole thing. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Don't forget to subscribe, leave a comment, and scope the links down below! Kudos are always welcome. Have a great day!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Comments are moderated, but do not be shy to leave one. I'm excited to read them! </p>
<p>This chapter is NSFW!</p>
<p>Sorry this chapter took so long to publish. 2020 effed me up, and then I was working literally seven days a week for like, two and a half months and almost died ☠️. I hope you enjoy.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>	Settling into his bed, Steve gathered his book off the nightstand. Part of him missed the act of reading in a quiet home alone, regardless of how much space he had here. This place didn’t always feel like home. Most of the time it felt like a job, like a long one without breaks. He didn’t mind it of course, it gave him something to take his mind off of everything else. Now, with Tony in his heart and his bed, there was barely anything to need to distract himself from, except the one thing he always needed distracting from. As he opened <em>Catcher in the Rye</em>, flipping to his bookmark, Steve’s mind drifted back to his conversation with Nat. Maybe she was right, sharing wasn’t too scary. In all the months they’d spent together, he and Nat had learned so little about each other, but it was somehow okay, because the two understood each other, and knew that even words couldn’t fill the void left by those who were long gone from their lives. Even so, Steve didn’t understand why she felt so pressed to insist that Steve give up that one part of himself that still belonged to only him. The only other person who knew even half of it was Peggy, and she’d been so understanding, kind and brilliant. He’d never met a woman like her. It took Steve a long moment to realize he wasn’t truly reading, just skimming the page. Maybe it was just part of getting older as a Super Soldier, but Steve felt exhausted, totally off his game. It wasn’t often he got the opportunity to just rest without disruption, and for once, he felt the need to take the opportunity in stride. Unwilling to rise to change, Steve simply unbuttoned his jeans and slid further down onto the bed, placing his bookmark back between the pages he’d picked up on, and sliding his book back onto the nightstand. He deserved this, definitely. </p>
<p>#</p>
<p>	Steve was sleeping soundly, legs crossed and still propped a bit in bed when Tony opened the door. A satisfied grin slid across Tony’s face as he entered the room, and for a second all he did was lean against the wall to watch Steve sleep. Toeing off his shoes, Tony set down his briefcase and carefully closed the door, trying to be as soundless as possible. Steve sleeping was a rare sight, since the man typically thought being a Super Soldier gave him the ability to go days without a true night's rest. Tony knew Steve pushed himself too hard, but was hesitant to say anything, since he knew so much of the team relied on his steadfast nature. But Tony planned to take advantage of this seemingly unique opportunity, taking a few moments to collect a new pair of sweats from the drawer of their shared dresser. He was incredulous, still, that no one had called them out yet. Maybe the team was just too polite, but Tony suspected something less egalitarian behind it. He wouldn’t be surprised if Nat had set up a betting ring, egged on by Sam or Rhodey. Stealing into the bathroom, Tony disrobed, pulling the too big black sweats up over his slender hips, reveling in the idea of a midday nap with Steve. The nervousness brought on by this morning's admission had all but abated, especially after he watched Nat and Steve leave together. Steve could play like he was old fashioned, but he got on with Natasha better than most of the team. Maybe it was their shared mysterious past, or maybe it was just that Steve felt like he had to act responsible in front of everyone else, because of some insane idea of honor and chivalry. Tony looked himself over in the mirror, nodded, then snuck back into the bedroom. Shimmying quietly around the bed, Tony got halfway onto his side before Steve grunted and woke up with a start, blinking against the bright light of the bedroom, still filled with the afternoon sun. </p>
<p>	Tony groaned and finished climbing onto the bed. </p>
<p>	“I was hoping you would stay asleep,” Tony said, sitting back on his heels. “I miss napping with you.” Smiling sweetly, Steve waved Tony over, opening his arms for the smaller of the two to climb into. Tony slid across the bed, tossing a leg over one of Steve’s as he settled his head on Steve’s broad chest. </p>
<p>	“How was your meeting?” Steve asked, stifling a yawn behind his hand. He brushed a few stray hairs away from Tony’s forehead, watching as his eyes flickered shut with a hum.</p>
<p>	“It was good,” Tony replied. “Helen is a saint, as always. Wish you’d stayed.” </p>
<p>	“Well,” Steve whispered, nuzzling his face into Tony’s hair, “then I either would have fallen asleep there or made you end the conference early so I could take you right there on the table.” </p>
<p>	“Mmm,” Tony hummed, “I would’ve.” </p>
<p>	“And that’s why it’s good I left,” Steve said with a chuckle, “the whole team uses that table.” </p>
<p>	“We would’ve cleaned up,” Tony countered. </p>
<p>	“I’d never be able to look at it with a straight face ever again,” Steve reasoned. Tony laughed and nodded. </p>
<p>	“I guess you’re right.” Snuggling in closer, Tony opened his eyes and watched Steve’s hand move across his arm. “Why so sleepy?” </p>
<p>	“You kept an old man up far too late last night,” Steve replied, “and I got all excited this morning only to be interrupted.” </p>
<p>	“I see,” Tony said. “Well, old man, we could resolve that, or I could tell you about my meeting.” </p>
<p>	“Let me lay here and listen to you talk,” Steve replied, leaning his head back against the headboard. “I like your voice.” Tony sat up with a grunt, sliding off the bed to fetch his briefcase. He talked the whole way. There was something magical about the way Tony talked that made even the most scientific jargon sound reasonable. Remembering back to one of their first meetings, he could hardly believe how far their relationship had come, and as he watched Tony set his briefcase on the bed and flip it open, Steve considered just how lucky he was. Taking out papers and spreading them across the bed for Steve to look at, Tony began to talk, and animatedly. The words tumbled from his mouth with fluidity and understanding, barely stopping long enough to breathe. </p>
<p>	<em>This </em>had to be Steve’s favorite thing about Tony, how his passion became almost like a spiritual reckoning. It awoke something in him that, now Steve knew how Tony actually thought, looked more like excitement and nerves than unconscionable arrogance. As Tony passed and gesticulated alongside his rapid speech, Steve felt the words he’d so carefully avoided this morning begin to form again on the tip of his tongue. Despite himself, he forced them down, trying to focus on the impromptu lecture Tony was giving him. His concentration ebbed and flowed, and all the while, Steve kept coming back to the same conclusion. The man before him was remarkable, a beacon of light and hope, and Steve was probably the luckiest man alive. The harder Steve tried to focus, the more those three little words pushed against his teeth. He swallowed them again, nodding in response to a question that Steve missed. It didn’t matter if he heard, Tony was just happy to have someone watch him. That could be seen as intolerable, and even looking back, both of them understood where the differences between them had come from. Steve was the silent, stoic one, never one for big speeches or trying to inspire with more than persistence. Tony had made a living talking to audiences for years — all he had was his personality. And it <em>was</em> a winning one. It had won him over after all, hadn’t it? Clenching his jaw, Steve watched and listened for as long as he could, but it was too much. He had to say something. </p>
<p>	“I love you,” Steve interrupted. </p>
<p>	“It’s just such an interesting procee—” Tony stopped pacing, hands frozen in midair, the breath that caught in the middle of his sentence quickly expelled. “I’m sorry, what?” he asked, sidling up to the bedside. Lifting Steve’s legs onto his lap, he sat and waited expectantly for a response. </p>
<p>	“I love you.” A hesitant smile crept onto Steve’s face as he watched the other’s expression go from shock to disbelief, finally landing on confusion. He had to look away from Tony, the incredulous stare overwhelming in its intensity. </p>
<p>	Tony huffed. “It may seem like I’m putting on airs,” he began, “but can you say it one more time, so I know I’m not hallucinating?” </p>
<p>	“Tony,” Steve groaned, rolling his eyes. Their gazes locked when he looked back up. Frowning in realization, he understood by the look on Tony’s face that he meant it. He needed to hear it again. “I love you.” Tony quickly cast his eyes away, and the expression that followed was one Steve had never seen Tony make before. With his brow furrowed, eyes squinting, his tongue jabbed and probing in the side of his mouth, it took Tony a long time to respond. When he did, it was with a shaky voice, as if he was holding something at bay. </p>
<p>	“Are you sure?” he asked. Steve nodded, but continued to watch without speaking. It looked to him as if a battle was raging inside Tony, and he didn’t want to interrupt it with unnecessary words. “I care about you, you have to know that.” The tone he used on Steve was pleading, nearly desperate, as was the change in his expression. Heart dropping a few inches, Steve hid his disappointment well. </p>
<p>	“I do,” he replied, reaching out to grip tightly one of Tony’s hands. “And you don’t have to say anything you’re not ready to say.” </p>
<p>	“It’s not—” Tony stuttered. In a sudden movement, Tony maneuvered to kneel beside Steve on the other side of the bed. His fingers plucked gently at the button that held Steve’s breast pocket closed. “It’s not that I don’t, it’s just…” The sentence trailed into nonexistence, where Steve waited for it to return. When it didn’t, he nudged Tony gently in the side. </p>
<p>	“Hey,” Steve whispered, “I’m still listening. What’s wrong?” Watching as Tony’s eyes whipped around the room, landing on everything but Steve, he knew there was a battle raging deep within his boyfriend, something that he would never understand. </p>
<p>	“I—” Tony started, cutting himself off to start again. “It’s hard to explain.” </p>
<p>	“That’s okay,” Steve replied. “You don’t need to.” </p>
<p>	“I know but…” Tony let Steve pull him into his lap, sitting astride him. He wasn’t a small man, but compared to Steve, he always felt so protected by him when Steve held him like this. One of Steve’s hands reached up to rub slow circles into his back, and the other gently caressed his face. </p>
<p>	“You don’t need to do anything, just accept that I love you.” Steve smiled and leaned forward, placing a tender kiss on the tip of Tony’s nose. </p>
<p>	“Well,” Tony said, leaning in more, “if this is my punishment, maybe I should not say I love you more often.” </p>
<p>	Steve barked out a laugh and sat forward again to press his lips against Stony’s. The kiss was slow and sweet, sort of tired and quiet. Flicking his tongue out to run along the seam of Steve’s lips, Tony pushed the kiss deeper, his mouth opening greedily to invite in Steve’s tongue. They both released a slow breath, and as Steve’s hands came down to palm Tony’s ass, Tony let out a low moan, gravelly in the back of his throat. He clutched at Steve’s hair, making their kiss ragged and dirty, and the slick noises of their mouths slotting together was the only noise that filled the room. Tony broke away first, looking down at Steve with dark pupils and flushed cheeks.</p>
<p>	“I love you, too,” he whispered, brushing down the now disheveled mess that was Steve’s hair. The smile that broke across Steve’s face was brilliant and mesmerizing. The look faded Tony’s worry, brought his hope bubbling back to the surface, and had him resting his forehead against Steve’s just long enough to breathe in the smell of him. The quiet spell was broken by a soft knock on the door, and Tony sat back, resting gently on Steve’s thighs. It didn’t matter to him anymore who knew. He wanted the whole world to know. </p>
<p>	Steve, however, looked more tense. He grabbed Tony’s wrist, squinting at the watch face there. </p>
<p>	“Who is it?” he called, rubbing sleep from his eyes. </p>
<p>	“Me,” said Nat as she poked her head into the room. Her voice lowered to a whisper. “Am I interrupting?” </p>
<p>	“No,” said Steve, lacing his fingers through Tony’s. “Not this time, at least. </p>
<p>	“Great,” Nat said, stepping in and closing the door behind her. “The gang and I are having some drinks, and we were wondering if you would like to join us?” </p>
<p>	“Well,” Tony started, glancing at Steve, who still looked exhausted. “It’s up to Steve.” </p>
<p>	“Who’s here?” asked Steve, reaching up without releasing Tony to rub the sleep from his eyes. </p>
<p>	“Uh,” Nat said, “I mean, the usual. Rhodes, Wilson, Wanda, Vision, me… you two… Clint was supposed to be here this weekend but—”</p>
<p>	“Girlfriend trouble?” Tony ribbed, winking. He was still perched on Steve’s lap, guiding Steve’s hands up and down his thighs. Nat’s mouth flattened into a line and she shrugged, shuffling her feet awkwardly. </p>
<p>	“We’ll be out in just a minute. I want to shower first,” Steve said, pulling his hands away to stretch and yawn. Tony waggled his eyebrows at Nat, earning himself a sharp laugh; Steve’s face pinked at the implication and he poked Tony in the chest.</p>
<p>	“Alright,” Nat said, “don’t be too long though, I might drink all the whiskey.” With a furtive wink to Tony, She slipped from the room. The men remained seated on the bed, just staring at one another for a long moment. Steve could feel the heat building in his groan and knew if he didn’t get up, Tony would definitely be joining him in the shower. Part of him wanted to drag Tony in with him, regardless of their promise to join the group — but, no. </p>
<p>	“C’mon,” Steve said, patting Tony’s thighs, ignoring the eye roll he received in return. Moving as slowly as possible, he lifted off Steve’s legs and landed with a grumble on the other side of the bed. “I’ll be quick,” Steve promised leaning over to give Tony a chaste kiss on the cheek.</p>
<p>	“Better be,” Tony muttered. “Not like there’s much to do in there without me.” Steve barked out a laugh, shaking his head as he rose off the bed. He stretched again, exposing a small strip of his stomach over the line of his jeans. Tony watched him hungrily, then cleared his throat and looked away quickly. “Go on then, before I change my mind and follow you in.” </p>
<p>	Steve winked at Tony over his shoulder and meandered into the bathroom. There was a slim part of Steve which still worried over what they’d just admitted to each other. Nine month wasn’t too soon, right? Steve didn’t think so, but he’d only ever been in love… well, needless to say, he wasn’t exactly an expert at romance. Not to say there hadn’t been romance in the last nine months — it just wasn’t something that came naturally to Steve. </p>
<p>	The bathroom was wide, tiled with white and grey stone, sparsely decorated. God Bless Pepper Potts and her ability to design, because Steve was positive if it had been up to Tony, there would be a much different feel to the bathroom. The shower was separate from the bath, taking up half a wall, far too fancy for Steve’s liking. He’d never understood the need for such a luxe bath until he and Tony had showered together for the first time. When he last came home from tracking Rumlow, he’d poured the hottest bath he could stand and soaked for half an hour, reveling in the jets and foam and water up to his shoulders. For just a moment, he thought about Tony, and how many secret showers they’d shared. Turning on the tap to the shower, he watched as the two shower heads sputtered for half a second before ejecting steaming hot water. By the time he stepped under the spray, Steve’s dick was already half hard. He palmed himself, letting out a light sigh, and wished Tony was there to accompany him. Even as he thought it, he heard the door latch, and smiled knowingly to himself. Clothes hit the floor, and even though Steve stayed facing the water which fell from in front and above him, he could feel the gust of cool air on his back as Tony slid the glass door open and stepped in. </p>
<p>	Wrapping his hand around Steve’s cock from behind, Tony gave it a firm stroke and tipped his head up to whisper in the other’s ear. </p>
<p>	“I figure,” Tony murmured, stepping closer to press his semi against Steve’s ass, “we were so rudely interrupted this morning, they can wait an extra few minutes. No way Nat can blow through two bottles of whiskey on her own.” Steve let out a breathy chuckle that turned into a low moan as Tony brushed his thumb over the head of Steve’s cock. Every part of his body tingled and sung, and all he wanted to do was swing around and lift Tony up, slam into him over and over. But he would let Tony have this moment, let him show off and perform for him. It was one of the things he took pride in, watching Tony learn and grow and be patient. Head falling forward, Steve braced himself against the wall with one hand, while his other ghosted over Tony’s hand, following his movements up and down the length of his erection. A groan of frustration escaped him as Tony released him, reaching up for the bar of soap. The quiet intimacy of the moment grew as Tony lathered the soap over Steve’s skin, never turning him or moving around to face him. It was when Steve felt Tony drop to his knees that instinct overtook sense, and he turned to see Tony knelt under the rain head, water dripping off his nose and catching on his eyelashes. </p>
<p>	Biting his lip, Steve brushed the wet hair off Tony’s face, tightening his fingers into a fist on the back of Tony’s scalp. A soft cry, half-pleasure, half-pain, slipped from Tony, and he caught Steve’s cock in his free hand. He let the soap fall to the floor of the shower, ignoring the dull thunk in favor of brushing his closed lips against the head of Steve’s cock. Steve’s breathing was shallow and heady, head falling back as Tony’s tongue flicked out against his slit. Vision blurring, Steve gripped Tony tighter as the tip of his tongue trailed from Steve’s ultra-sensitive head to the base of his shaft, laving for a moment over his balls before winding back up. Steve’s body was coiled and ready, and it wouldn’t be long before he finished. The interruption from this morning had only made this experience all that more delicious. For one crazy second, he hoped they’d be interrupted again, just so he could deflate and come back to this. But Tony was needy, wrapping his mouth around Steve’s dick and taking as much down as he could. Watching Tony choke on his dick was something Steve could do for hours, especially as water continued to drip off his nose and chin, and he shifted uncomfortably on the tile flooring. </p>
<p>	“Oh,” Steve said, struggling to keep his eyes open, desperate to watch Tony for every single second of his orgasm. “Touch yourself.” Never one to be asked twice, Tony’s free hand ripped down to his own blushing cock, stroking his hardness while moaning. He continued to swallow against Steve’s dick, and when he flicked his eyes up to meet Steve’s, he knew he was done for. A strangled sound escaped Steve’s throat as he fought back the yell of pleasure that tried to overtake him. He bit down into his fist as Tony moaned softly and swallowed down Steve’s load. Releasing a slow, shaky breath, Steve shook his head as Tony leaned back, smacking his lips and wiping his mouth. The water was off and Tony was hoisted over Steve’s shoulder before he could even begin to protest. Steve didn’t feel like drying off — he just wanted to return the favor. From the bathroom, he carried Tony over his shoulder into the bedroom, where he deposited him unceremoniously onto the bed. Dropping to his knees in front of Tony, Steve brushed his fingers up Tony’s still damp legs and placed open mouthed kisses up his thighs until he reached his prize. </p>
<p>	It only took a second for Tony to fall back onto the bed, forgoing being propped up on his elbows to enjoy the feeling of Steve’s tongue working from the base of his hard on to the tip. They both knew he wouldn’t last long, not with the taste of Steve still in his mouth and the idea of all their friends waiting in the sitting room. Pushing his legs up, Steve dipped his face down to Tony’s ass, brushing his tongue over his tight, pink asshole once, twice, a third time. Tony closed his eyes, letting himself fall into the feeling rather than fight to prolong it. Each dip that Steve took, every brush of his lips and tongue pushed him closer and closer to the edge. Tony gasped loudly when Steve slipped one spit slicked finger up his ass, pulling him closer, laying Tony’s legs over Steve’s shoulders, so he could pump his digit in and out while worshiping his cock with his tongue. Tony’s breaths were coming in rapid gulps now, and even as he tried to stop the moan that was building in his throat, he still had to clamp both hands over his mouth and nose. </p>
<p>	“Oh, fuck,” Steve whispered, pumping Tony’s hot cum onto his stomach as he continued to murmur to him. “Yes, baby, cum for me. That’s a good boy.” Dragging in a deep lungful of air, Tony whimpered as Steve slowed his strokes on his cock. When he looked up, Steve was resting his head against Tony’s sweat-slicked thigh. </p>
<p>	“Holy—” Tony muttered, letting his head drop against the bed again. “Do we have to go out there?” Steve laughed and settled Tony’s legs gently on the floor, helping him up off the bed. </p>
<p>	“Go rinse off, I’ll grab you some clothes.” Steve laid a kiss on Tony’s forehead. “I love you.” </p>
<p>	Smiling, Tony scurried into the bathroom, followed slowly by Steve. He washed his hands and face in the sink, humming to himself as he dried off. There was nothing more satisfying for him than watching the man he loved hit euphoria in real time. Back in the bedroom, he pulled out a pair of sweats and a too big shirt for Tony, throwing on himself a pair of boxer briefs and old, paint splattered shirt before tugging his jeans back up over his hips. Running a hand over the sheets, he figured they would dry before bed. They were damp, not soaked, and they’d done worse damage with their own sweat before. Popping back into the bathroom, Steve watched Tony step out of the shower, knees still a little weak. A smirk crossed his face at the sight, and when Tony looked over, he just glared defiantly. </p>
<p>	“Do you want me to meet you out there?” asked Steve nonchalantly. Nodding, Tony waved him off. </p>
<p>	“I’ll be out in just a minute,” Tony said, absentmindedly repeating their lie from earlier. </p>
<p>	“Faster than our ‘just a minute’, I hope,” Steve teased, earning a sigh and eye roll combo. Swallowing down his nerves, he paused before leaving. “Do you want to tell everyone?” </p>
<p>	“Tell everyone?” Tony asked from his bent over position, busy drying his feet. “About… what? Us?” </p>
<p>	“Yeah,” Steve said, shrugging. Tony looked up, a calculating expression crossing his still blushing face. “If you don’t want to, we don’t have to.” </p>
<p>	“No,” Tony said, straightening up and wrapping the towel around his waist, much to Steve’s disappointment. “Let’s do it. But I’ll still meet you out there. Just play along, yeah?” With a wink, Tony shooed Steve away. One deep breath later, Steve was stepping into the hall, where the noise of the living room filled the space with rowdy enthusiasm. When he stepped into the common space, he earned himself a keen wink from Nat, who tapped her hand against her wrist knowingly. He sat on the loveseat opposite Sam, who was already looking frustrated at a story that Rhodey was trying to, apparently incorrectly, tell. </p>
<p>	“That is <em>not</em> how it went,” Sam interjected, obviously annoyed. “She didn’t just… reject me.” </p>
<p>	“Really?” asked Rhodey with a smirk. “Cuz that’s what it sounded like from my end.” </p>
<p>	“No, she said she’d give me a call,” Sam said with a frown. </p>
<p>	“Who are we talking about?” Steve asked, leaning forward in an attempt to beat the nerves curling through his stomach. Nat handed him a beer, which he took gratefully, happy for something to do with his hands. </p>
<p>	“Just one of the women Rhodes and I work with at the office,” Sam said, glaring at Rhodes. </p>
<p>	“You left me sweatpants?” Tony’s voice came from behind the group, and Steve turned instinctively, though not before catching Nat’s eye. An expression of pure exhilaration crossed her face in the moment before he looked at Tony. He was not, in fact, wearing the sweats and shirt that Steve had left out for him, but instead a pair of his own jeans. Not surprising in the least, if Steve thought about it. What was surprising, however, was the too big shirt that Steve knew was his, because he’d been wearing it earlier that day. “I don’t even wear those to sleep,” Tony continued, slipping in between Steve and the coffee table to land unceremoniously beside him on the love seat. “But you know that by now, don’t you, Rogers?” </p>
<p>	Steve should’ve known when Tony had said to follow his lead, it would be something theatrical like this. Face burning red, he cocked a brow at Tony as he leaned back, tossing his legs up onto Steve’s lap as if they’d always belonged there, watching Steve in return with an air of competition. The silence that had fallen in the room was palpable, interrupted only by Nat clearing her throat in an attempt not to laugh. </p>
<p>	“Whatever prize money you win, Romanov, I want a cut. At least ten percent,” Tony said. Narrowing his eyes, Steve turned to look at Nat. </p>
<p>	“Did you—” Steve was incredulous as Rhodes and Sam moved to take their wallets out of their pockets. Wanda hopped up and dashed from the room, returning with a small coin purse of neat, woven fabric. </p>
<p>	“What do we owe?” Wanda asked, throwing an arm over Vision as she leaned forward. “I told you not to bet against her.” </p>
<p>	“It seemed like a definitive win,” Vision remarked, almost defeated. “I’d been watching Captain Rogers and Mr Stark for months, calculating the percentages. It could not have been more than seven months.” </p>
<p>	“Well, I bet six before they broke up,” Rhodes said, pulling a few tens out of his wallet. “I only have thirty, can I get you the rest tomorrow?” </p>
<p>	“Hang on, I’m doing the math,” Nat said, tipping the notebook away from Vision as he attempted to read it over her shoulder. “Let’s see, we had by month… so that’s Rhodes with sixty, plus what he lost for them staying together at another fifty.” She pointed at Sam, still reading off her notebook. “Forty for the four months, but you get to keep twenty because they’re still together.” Taking the proffered twenty, she turned to Wanda. </p>
<p>	“Vis, you guessed a definitive seven months at ten dollars, and tried to double down. That makes seventy, thanks to Wanda stopping that in its tracks… but she saved you both forty by betting that they’d still be together! So thirty, in total.” </p>
<p>	“Damn,” Tony said, laughing at the expression on Rhodey’s face as he pulled out his checkbook. “You really don’t know your best friend.” </p>
<p>	“Wait! I get to keep all my money because I guessed ten month reveal, plus they’re still together… and I get an extra twenty from everyone for being the first one to find out.” </p>
<p>	“That’s not fair!” Sam said. “Vision was definitely the first one to find out.” </p>
<p>	“No, we all concluded that I could not be counted in that running,” Vision said reasonably. Wanda removed her arm, glaring down at Vision as she pulled out a few various bills and handed them to Nat. Sam pulled another twenty out of his wallet and pointed at Steve.</p>
<p>	“You owe me for not telling me,” Sam said. </p>
<p>	“You know me better than Rhodes knows Tony,” Steve said with a laugh. Taking another long slug of his beer, he leaned back, enjoying the gentle ribbing that Natasha’s obsession with betting on her friends personal lives had created. Shaking his head, Rhodey leaned over to Tony, speaking in an undertone that only the pair on the loveseat could hear. </p>
<p>	“To be fair, I’ve never seen Tony this happy, so that’s the best one-hundred and thirty dollars I’ve ever lost,” Rhodey said with a grin. Faux disgust crossed Tony’s face, and he shoved his friend away. </p>
<p>	“You disgust me,” Tony said, teasingly. Flipping Tony off, Rhodes rose from his seat and stretched, then walked to the bar. “Will you grab me a whiskey, best friend who knows nothing about me?” </p>
<p>	The rambunctious mood settled back into easy discussion as Steve pressed Sam for more information about this mystery girl he’d been apparently rejected by. Light jazz played in the background, creating a quiet atmosphere that they all so rarely got to enjoy. The last time they’d all sat around together had been before Ultron. To Steve, it felt like it could have been yesterday or ten years ago. So, he settled into the conversation, listening to Wanda and Vision bicker about him using her money, watching as Nat laughed at another one of Tony’s ridiculous stories pre-Avengers, and speaking in bits and pieces to Sam. He was more than happy to just watch as the movement happened, only getting up to replace his beer a couple times, and to replace Tony’s whiskey a couple times more than that. As the tone ebbed into the quiet of the night, a comfortable silence fell on the room. Tony yawned and checked his watch, which Steve read over his shoulder. It was well past eleven at night, although he supposed the only people that would really affect were the three non-supers sitting with the rest of the only-just-human team. Tony shifted on the loveseat so his head was resting more comfortably on Steve’s shoulder, curled under his strong arm. Other than the brief moment of incredulity, his friends seemed to have better things to worry about than the relationship status of Steve Rogers and Tony Stark. </p>
<p>	“When did each of you figure it out?” asked Steve at a natural pause in the conversation. “About us, I mean,” he clarified at the confused glances toward him from the others in the room. </p>
<p>	“Oh!” Nat said. </p>
<p>	“I think we all figured it out at different times,” Sam said, to which Wanda nodded enthusiastically. “We just all sat down to talk about it about a month ago.” </p>
<p>	“Is that when Nat decided to steal all of your money?” Tony asked, a huge grin plastered to his face. </p>
<p>	“Can’t say,” Nat said, standing to walk over to the bar with a certain swagger in her step. </p>
<p>	“Well,” Wanda said, leaning forward, “I was privy to a little more information, because of Vision, but he didn’t even share everything he knew with me.” </p>
<p>	“I am an equal opportunity informationist,” Vision said slyly. “I can’t give all the details to one person just because—”</p>
<p>	“Anyway,” Wanda cut off quickly, glancing between Tony and Vision. “Vis figured it out first, of course, and then I think Nat.” </p>
<p>	“Nat figures everything out first,” Steve said, eyeing Wanda with suspicion. “When was that?” </p>
<p>	“Well, it’s April now…” Nat counted backwards on her fingers. “I figured out right around Christmas.” </p>
<p>	“I knew by Thanksgiving,” Vision said brightly. Wanda rolled her eyes at him. </p>
<p>	“And you, supposed best friend?” asked Tony to Rhodes, his tone teasingly scathing. </p>
<p>	“I suspected around New Years that there was someone, but when I ran into you in the Village on Valentine’s Day, I knew something was up.” Rhodes leaned back. “Figured it was just a fling, and would burn out, much to everyone's disadvantage.” </p>
<p>	“Wow,” Steve said, looking at Sam. “So it was nearly fifty-fifty on whether we would stay together?” </p>
<p>	“Clint owes me money too,” Nat said, pulling out her phone. The whole group laughed at this, including Nat, even as she typed quickly on her screen. </p>
<p>	“What gave it away, Vis?” Tony questioned. Looking at him with some amusement, Vision took a long moment to respond. It took Wanda nudging him in the side for him to finally speak. </p>
<p>	“Well,” Vision started slowly, “my concern in revealing my methods of observation is that I may come off as unsettling.” </p>
<p>	“More than usual?” Sam muttered, raising his eyebrows in Steve’s direction. Stifling a laugh, Steve shook his head and waved for Vision to continue. </p>
<p>	“Alright,” Vision said, sitting up a little straighter. A look of faint pride came over his face, and in that moment, Steve realized just how human Vision was, despite his ability to process at light speed. “Taking into account that Captain Rogers—” Vision cut himself off, seeming to almost shake off his formality. “That Steve currently has no secondary dwelling, with the destruction of his Brooklyn apartment after the first appearance of Sergeant Barnes, he was living first in Stark Tower and now here full time. Tony, of course, tries to be ‘on scene’ as often as possible, so perhaps this is mere conjecture… but there seemed more nights than not in which Steve and Tony would be the only two not present at group rendezvous.” He looked around at the incredulous looks on everyone’s faces and quickly carried on. “Also taking into consideration the things that you all cannot tell, such as fluctuations in eye contact, body language, and heat signatures when near each other, as well as their general verbal rapport, my conclusion came at about Thanksgiving that they had been intimate more than once.” </p>
<p>	“Yep,” Sam said, standing to walk to the bar again. “Definitely unsettling.” </p>
<p>	Looking between Vision and Nat, Tony opened his mouth once, then twice, and then finally settled on his words. “And you let him bet… why?” </p>
<p>	“Because I know Steve,” Nat said, still looking at her phone. Locking it, she scrunched her nose and made eye contact with Steve, who watched her more closely than he usually would. There was something off about her now, the way she sat on the edge of the couch, how spry she held herself, as if pushing down difficult emotions. Cocking his head, he raised his eyebrows at her, silently communicating in a way that only the two of them had perfected. The spy and the soldier; what an odd duo they were. A frown creased her brow and she shook her head almost imperceptibly, just enough to let Steve know it was time to turn in. Grabbing Tony’s wrist to look at his watch again, he forced a yawn and stretched, extricating himself from beneath Tony with some difficulty. </p>
<p>	“It’s late now, and my very unexpected nap was not refreshing,” Steve said, looking at Tony, who’d decided to rag doll against Steve instead of trying to regain his own stability after Steve had pulled away. “Shall we?” </p>
<p>	“Mmm,” Tony said, slamming back the last of his whiskey and sitting up. “We shall.” Waving a quick goodnight to the group, Steve pulled Tony up, slinging an arm over his shoulders as they meandered slowly to their bedroom. It felt good, this weight of hiding lifted off his chest, even if everyone had, apparently, already known. Closing the door behind him, Steve watched Tony walk into the room, unbuttoning Steve’s shirt as he went.</p>
<p>	“Do you ever think about the future?” Tony asked, letting Steve’s shirt drop to the floor as he turned. Walking forward, Steve leaned down to pick up his shirt before answering, brushing it off and laying it carefully on the chair beside their dresser. </p>
<p>	“Sometimes,” Steve said, pulling his own shirt off over his head and depositing it less carefully in the same chair. “I guess it depends.” He watched as Tony unbuttoned his pants now, beginning the process of removing his own in turn. </p>
<p>	“Yeah,” Tony said, shrugging. </p>
<p>	“Why do you ask?” Steve stepped out of his pants and threw them onto the chair, then stepped to stand beside Tony at the bed. When Tony dropped his pants, Steve was unsurprised to see he’d gone commando; at first, it had given Steve a rush to know that Tony only had one layer between him and his dick, now it was enough to make Steve chuckle and roll his eyes. Casual had gone to routine, routine to regular. </p>
<p>	“I mean,” Tony said, sitting back on the bed. Steve turned to the dresser and pulled out a shirt and boxers for Tony, tossing them at him in a crumpled mess. Tossing them back, Tony settled into the headboard, splaying out for Steve. “I have to settle down eventually, right?” </p>
<p>	“One would hope,” Steve replied, tossing the clothes between Tony’s legs before he grabbed the sweats off the end of the bed and pulled them on. “You are old, after all.” </p>
<p>	“Rich coming from a ninety-eight year old,” Tony muttered, pulling on the shirt with some resignation. The pressure from earlier, with all their admittances to each other and the rest of their team was nearly gone. It almost felt back to normal, instead of heart stopping and nerve wracking. </p>
<p>	“Ah, but somehow blessed with the body of a spry thirty-two year old,” Steve teased, winking. Shaking his head, Tony chuckled to himself. </p>
<p>	“Damn, make me feel close to robbing the cradle why don’t you,” he replied, pulling the boxers up over his ass and resuming the same position, dominating the head of the bed. Steve crawled across the bed and rested between Tony’s legs, looking up at the man he’d somehow found himself so lucky to end up with. </p>
<p>	“Trust me,” Steve said, tipping his head up to press a tender kiss to Tony’s lips. “The only thing you’ve robbed is my heart.” </p>
<p>	Faking a gag, Tony turned away from Steve, then shouted with laughter as Steve began to tickle his sides. By the time Steve backed off, Tony was sitting astride him, Steve facing backwards on the bed. They were both pink in the face and winded, anticipated laughter bubbling from them each time one of them moved a hand.</p>
<p>	“What’s all this talk of settling down?” Steve asked, looping his fingers through Tony’s. It took Tony a long minute to answer. The look on his face was a contemplative one; he chewed his lip a little as his eyes roved over Steve’s face, weighing the moment before he responded. When he did reply, it was by clambering off the bed to grab his phone from the bathroom. Depositing his forgotten clothes in the hamper on the way back, Tony bounded across Steve and laid beside him on the bed, still breathing heavily. The lights in the room dimmed as he tapped and swiped across the screen a few times. Steve tried to peek over Tony’s shoulder, but was shoved playfully away before he could. Shaking his phone lightly, Tony laid it on his chest, letting the internal projector display a series of images across the shadowed ceiling. There was a house, small, but beautifully built, and a lake and a dock. In the back, just before a line of dark green conifers, a small boat house sat on the far edge of the lake, looking a little ramshackle, but well loved. For a moment, Steve was completely overwhelmed, trying to make sense of the images he was being shown.</p>
<p>	“I, uh—” Tony started, pausing to clear his throat uncomfortably. Instead of talking, he simply raised his hand and scrolled through the pictures, showing Steve the inside of the house. There was little furniture — it was obviously made up for photos and display, but somehow the minimal design made the home still feel cozy. There was a large, wood burning fireplace and a carpeted living room. </p>
<p>“I’ve had my eye on this property for a few years,” Tony finally carried on. “It’s just never been for sale, and the time was never…” Trailing off, he watched Steve cock his head to the side, reaching up to slide through the fifty or so odd pictures in the reel. Something about the house made Steve feel choked up. </p>
<p>	“Is it for sale now?” Steve asked, more a prompt for Tony to keep talking than a genuine question. It was never something he’d be able to afford, despite his boyfriend being Tony and being an Avenger. </p>
<p>	“Yeah, uh,” Tony scrolled quickly to the listing, details displayed across the ceiling dark and clear.</p>
<p>	“Um,” Steve choked, looking at the price. “Babe, it’s two million dollars.” </p>
<p>	“I cough and make two mil,” Tony teased, letting out a few fake coughs to emphasize this point. “I’m gonna buy it, I just wanted to know your thoughts, too.” </p>
<p>	“I think it’s wonderful, Tony,” Steve said. He didn’t elaborate, didn’t want to ruin the magic of the moment, which was fine by both of them. Despite being the wrong way around on the bed, Tony turned on some light music and curled up against Steve, watching the images scroll through a slow slideshow on their own. Neither spoke, just let the music play and the pictures pass by. Every so often, Steve would push a kiss into the top of Tony’s head, or just look at him. Everything was right, right here, right now. All either of them could hope was that it would stay like this for a while longer. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Scope the links below for more! I'm going to try to be more active on my social media accounts, so make sure you're following. I'm going to try to come up with some fun content for TikTok in the future, as well as plans for a couple podcasts 👀</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>😬 I was supposed to post this chapter last week, but life got ahead of me and school started. Now more than ever though, I'm going to need a distraction. </p>
<p> We're gonna be without smut for about three chapters. I know, so boring, but I need to do some world building before I can get our boys down and dirty again. </p>
<p> The love you gave to How We Say Goodbye was incredible, and I'll definitely be writing a few more stories like that as I carry on with Civil Heart and it's (spoiler alert) sequels and other in-world stories. I look forward to seeing your response to this chapter, and the good news is that I'm turning off comment moderation for now. </p>
<p> Thanks for being so patient with me and thanks for sticking with this story. I won't promise anything, but I'm hoping to have the next chapter up in about two weeks (I fell behind in my actual drafting, so I need some time to work on that before I can carry on. </p>
<p> Much love and happy reading! </p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>	There was a name slipping down the back of Steve’s throat as he woke suddenly, fleeing from his waking mind. Covered in a cold sweat, he looked beside him at the sleeping form of Tony. Something in Steve’s heart pulled and ached at the sight, pleased and overwhelmed by the actual peace he saw on his boyfriend’s face. A hesitant almost memory lingered on the edge of his mind. It felt like whatever dream he’d just had hurt, and it clung to his brain, settled into his skin. Sleep wasn’t an option right now, not after what he’d just woken from. Still, Steve didn’t want to wake Tony over a bad dream, especially when it would just worry them both more. Extracting himself with care, Steve moved from the bed slowly, ensuring he wouldn’t jostle Tony enough to wake him. </p>
<p>	Grabbing his book from the nightstand, he intended to sit in the lounge until he felt like he could return. The clock on the nightstand read just after three am, so it wouldn’t take long for him to return to the dark bedroom. Even so, he needed to clear his mind before trying to rest again. Steve stood and crossed the bedroom slowly, slipping through the door without a sound and closing it behind him. There was still a light on in the sitting area — Steve made a mental note to ask Tony to reinstall the timer. As he closed in on the room, however, he found that he could sense more than just a rising electricity bill; the sounds of a person were set against the ambient hum of the compound, and he suspected he was unprepared for the encounter he was about to have. Quietly, Steve leaned against a pillar, watching as Nat typed quickly into her phone before she looked up and jumped, wiping tears from her eyes as quickly as she could. </p>
<p>	“Hey,” Steve said, tone soft. He approached with the same caution he would a scared or wounded animal, doing his best to keep from forcing his presence on her. If Nat wanted to leave, he’d let her. </p>
<p>	“Hey,” Nat said with a fake, coughing laugh, setting her phone face down on the table in front of her. An awkward silence followed, in which Steve sat on the edge of the loveseat he’d occupied only a few hours earlier, his book clutched like a lifeline between his hands. </p>
<p>	“Are you okay?” he asked, raising one eyebrow as she scoffed and nodded. </p>
<p>	“Of course.” Standing, Natasha snatched up her phone, watching as Steve leaned forward and continued to focus on her, waiting for her to make a move. “Are you?” </p>
<p>	“Just more nightmares,” Steve replied, “figured I’d come out here and try to settle down instead of wake Tony. Are you sure you don’t want to, I don’t know, talk?” </p>
<p>	“I—” Nat broke off, clearly unsure. Returning to her seat, she glanced away from Steve as tears formed again, exhaustion taking over the façade she’d put on at Steve’s arrival. “Do you ever wonder what our lives would be like without this?” At the confused look Steve gave her, Nat gestured around her. “If we’d stayed in our bubbles. If you’d never gone into the ice and Clint had never nabbed me from Budapest?” </p>
<p>	“Always.” Shifting back, Steve rubbed his tired eyes with the flat of his hand, then let his head fall onto the back of the loveseat with a sigh. “I think about where I’d without every step of who I’ve become, Nat. That’s normal for people like us.” </p>
<p>	“It’s exhausting,” Nat whispered. Looking up, Steve saw her shoulders shake as a wave of sobs came over her, and moved quickly to sit beside her. Wrapping one arm over her shoulders, he pulled Nat into his chest and let her cry there for a few minutes before trying to say anything. He’d never been very good at comfort; strangely, that had always been Bucky’s job with him. It would’ve been an easy assumption to think that all the loss Steve had faced would make him better equipped to handle someone crying, but still, tension took over before any natural, nurturing instinct could. </p>
<p>	“How can I help you?” Steve asked, looking down to push a piece of hair back from Natasha’s face and brush it behind her ear. </p>
<p>	“Unless you know how to track an Avenger’s Quin in stealth, there probably isn’t much you can do.” Nat moved from his grasp at the buzz of her phone, taking a deep breath before reading whatever was there. “Did I tell you that Clint had his baby?” </p>
<p>	“Yeah,” Steve said with a smile. “Nathaniel, right?” </p>
<p>	Nodding, Nat shifted a little bit on the couch, putting a few inches of space between the two of them. When she set her phone down and looked back up, there was still an air of tension behind the calm mask she wore. </p>
<p>	“What’s really wrong, Nat? Because I get the feeling that Bruce is only part of it.” Steve crossed his arms over his chest and watched as Nat tried to produce an answer, but they both knew that he could tell when she was lying. They’d worked together long enough for him to read her like that. </p>
<p>	“I feel out of step,” Nat said after a long pause. “Clint has a family, you have Tony, Wanda has Vision, Sam and Rhodey have their jobs with the military… what do I have except a ledger full of red and no way to wipe it clean?” </p>
<p>	Frowning, Steve moved forward and took one of Nat’s hand in his own. </p>
<p>	“Don’t say anything yet, I have to— it’s hard for me to be honest like this.” Sighing again, Nat held onto Steve’s hand like a lifeline, gripping with an intensity Steve had yet to yield from her. “I told you when I joined SHIELD I thought I was going straight, but we both know now that we were just selling someone else’s lies… but that’s not completely true. I—” Moving away, Nat stood and walked to the bar, and Steve tracked her the whole way, listening intently, even as she struggled to get out the right words. </p>
<p>	“When Clint made the call to take me in instead of kill me, it took me a while to understand what I’d gained. And even then, for a while, I wondered if he only made that call for… selfish reasons.” Pausing, Nat reached beneath the bar and grabbed two glasses, pouring a few fingers of whiskey into both of them before dropping a large ice cube into each from the freezer. Even in the quiet, Steve could feel her hesitant in the way she moved, how she averted her eyes, seemingly desperate not to look at him. </p>
<p>	“You know this, but before, er, any of us met, there was Clint. You know the feeling — you had Bucky when there was nothing… I had him and Laura. They saved me from myself. I don’t know if it was always real or—” She closed her eyes and leaned against the bar. A heaviness pressed into the room, brought on by Nat’s pause. Steve could feel where this was going, and though Nat was undoubtedly better at keeping her feelings covert, he’d spent enough time with her to suspect something other than only friendship with Barton. “I don’t know if it started as a self-defense tactic or something real, but all I know is it became really real really fast.” </p>
<p>	“So you and Barton…?” Steve questioned; when Nat nodded, Steve interjected before she could carry on. “For how long? Does Laura know? What about their kids— and why didn’t you ever tell anyone? I mean, this could’ve compromised—”</p>
<p>	“Steve,” Nat said quickly, cutting him off and letting out a surprised laugh as she grabbed up the two glasses and made her way back to the couch. “I guess I wasn’t quite clear enough. I always forget how old you are.” </p>
<p>	“Hey!” Steve exclaimed quietly, giving her a fake glare as he accepted his glass from Nat. Sitting beside him, Nat took a small sip and set the glass down with a clink against the glass tabletop. </p>
<p>	“Sorry,” Nat apologized with a smirk. “Old fashioned.” Swallowing, she seemed to be thinking about the right words. “Clint… he took me in, gave me a home. We were more than intimate. I trusted him in ways I’ve never trusted anyone before. All because he gave me a chance.” Trailing off into a whisper, she took a sip of her drink and steeled herself for something more unpleasant. “Laura knew about me before I knew about her. Our relationship is probably a little complicated for you.” </p>
<p>	“Try me,” Steve insisted with a frown. </p>
<p>	“Okay,” Nat said with a nervous chuckle. “Laura, Clint, and I have an arrangement that means the three of us are… uh…”</p>
<p>	“Together?” Steve shifted in his seat, looking at Nat with confusion. Face burning red, Nat glanced away, but nodded her assent. Still lost, Steve cleared his throat. “I don’t understand.” </p>
<p>	“Mmm.” Nat stood, finishing off her whiskey before holding up a finger and dashing from the room. When she returned, there was a book clutched in her hand, which she handed to Steve. The book was on the thinner side, plain white with little decoration, and on the front was the title ‘<em>The Ethical Non-Monogamy: How Love Always Wins</em>’. Flipping to the first page, Steve read through a few lines, but the meaning still wasn’t clicking. He’d heard of things like this when he was young, had run into the idea of men with many wives. But just like his own sexuality, he’d always been taught in church that it was taboo; against God’s will. Nat resumed her seat beside him, watching quietly as Steve processed the text. As he tried to return the book to her, she shook her head and pushed it back into his hands. </p>
<p>	“Read it,” she insisted. “I need someone on the outside of this to understand. Sometimes it’s lonely when the only people who know you already love you.” Setting the book down on top of the one he’d brought from the bedroom, Steve waited for Natasha to carry on. When she didn’t, he sighed and shook his head. </p>
<p>	“You’re really something, Romanoff,” Steve muttered with a chuckle. “I can barely keep a handle on Tony. I couldn’t even imagine trying to keep track of two people.” </p>
<p>	“Speaking of keeping track,” Nat started slowly, “any luck with our mystery man?” </p>
<p>	“No,” Steve replied, sighing again. “Sam said he lost him again, and I doubt he’ll make an appearance again any time soon. I’d try to stay off the grid too, if I were him.” </p>
<p>	“Can you tell me something?” Nat asked, eyeing Steve with something between curiosity and mischief. </p>
<p>	“I can’t promise I’ll answer,” Steve replied with a chuckle. </p>
<p>	“C’mon,” Nat whined. “I just told you one of my biggest secrets.” </p>
<p>	“Fine, ask.” As much as Steve trusted and even loved Nat, sometimes the best word for her questions was invasive. </p>
<p>	“What was he like, back then?” There was a long pause after Nat’s question, in which Steve pondered his answer and her meaning. </p>
<p>	“Back when?” Steve asked, trying to clarify. </p>
<p>	“You know,” Nat insisted. “Before the war, when you were young.” Scooting back, Nat moved to lay on her stomach, propping her hands under her chin. The situation would’ve been comical if the question wasn’t so sensitive. </p>
<p>	“Uh,” Steve said, squirming a little uncomfortably. “Honestly, sometimes I almost can’t remember. When he died— when I thought he was dead,” Steve paused and swallowed, taking a sip of his whiskey, just for something to do. “When I thought he was dead, I had to face the idea of a lifetime without him. And something about that completely changed the way I thought about him. But, uh… he was really something else. I’d never felt love the way he gave it to me.” Stillness fell between him and Nat, the kind of quiet he’d come to associate only with his moments with her in the time since Washington DC. </p>
<p>	“I met him, once.” The change of her tone, from interested to guilty, caught Steve off guard. </p>
<p>	“I know,” Steve said, shooting her a confused glance. “You said he shot—” Cutting off, his confusion grew as he shook his head. </p>
<p>	“I mean face to face,” she explained. “I didn’t know it was him. Even after I went to the museum to try to figure out— after what happened in Washington, I did some digging, and that file from Kiev brought it back.” Rolling her eyes, Nat cleared her throat and rolled onto her back, staring up at the ceiling. “I thought he looked familiar, but I couldn’t place where.” </p>
<p>	“Where?” asked Steve. There was a dark, desperate part of him that yearned for this piece of Bucky he was missing. So much of his life had been devoted to loving him, some habits didn’t die easy, he supposed. </p>
<p>	“Some in the Red Room thought men could be trained the same as us,” Nat said slowly. “It didn’t work, for obvious reasons. There’s less of a market for seductive men. Still, we all trained with him. It was embarrassing, how unequipped we were to face him.” </p>
<p>	Silence fell once again in the room, thick and heavy this time. The tension that hadn’t been there moments ago stirred something in Steve. It wasn’t that he couldn’t remember his life with Buck; of course he could. But those were memories that only one other person held, however far he was removed from them right now. Even Peggy, in whom he’d confided so much, only knew enough to understand his heartache — and even that was touch and go, as her memory and retention worsened. Could it hurt Steve so badly to let someone in, just this once? Some small part of him already knew that he’d want to tell Tony everything eventually. That day would come sooner, he guessed, rather than later. No harm in practicing. </p>
<p>	“He was, without a doubt, the most generous, kind, romantic man I’d ever had the pleasure of knowing.” Steve flexed his shoulders uncomfortably before continuing on, first draining the last sip of his whiskey. “It was the late thirties when we finally admitted what we felt for each other, so we had to take certain precautions.</p>
<p>	“Every double date, he would figure out ways to romance me while always making his girl feel noticed. He was good like that. And when my mom died…” Steve sniffled, suddenly fighting tears. “I was barely eighteen. There were still breadlines, I couldn’t do most of the factory jobs, so there weren’t a lot of options. He took care of me.” Sitting up, Nat moved close to Steve and caught his eye, sharing his gaze just long enough to actualize this moment for both of them. </p>
<p>	“He’s still in there. I promise.” Leaning in, she gently brushed her lips against Steve’s cheek, and when she pulled back there were tears wetting her face again. “Do you think you’ll ever tell Tony?” </p>
<p>	Shrugging, Steve coughed and looked away. </p>
<p>	“Maybe,” he replied. “I don’t totally see the point, since there’s less than no chance of that ever coming up again.” Nat laughed, scrunching her nose at him. </p>
<p>	“Never say never, rogers.” She murmured, standing and beginning to walk away from him, toward the stairs leading to the upper floor dorms. </p>
<p>	“One of your spy tips?” Steve called quietly after her. Glancing over her shoulder, Nat smirked at him.</p>
<p>	“One of my ‘I’ve had sex with more than two people’ tips.” Giving him a sad smile, she waved her hand at him, shooing him from the room. “Go to bed. Be in love. Thanks for sitting with me.” Steve didn’t reply, just watched her walk up the stairs until she disappeared. Even after she was gone, Steve didn’t move. He looked at the book she’d left him with and wondered about the seriousness of her words. They couldn’t possibly mean anything — the last time he’d seen Bucky, the man was trying to kill him, with no memory of who Steve was or where <em>either </em>of them had come from. If it hadn’t been for a well timed pillar, he could’ve — would’ve been worse off than a few broken ribs, a gunshot wound, and a concussion. So, no, Nat was wrong. He could definitely write off Bucky as a <em>never again</em>. Even without trying to kill Steve, those feelings were long gone. For both of them. </p>
<p>	Right?</p>
<p>	Gathering his books, Steve shook his head and stood. Of course right. Pacing back to the bedroom, he was unsurprised to find Tony still sound asleep. For the moment and for no reason other than to protect Natasha, he tucked the book she’d given him in the drawer of his nightstand, setting his current read on the tabletop beside his lamp. He was overthinking things, as usual. It wasn’t like Tony had exactly been open about his own relationships, right? </p>
<p>	<em>But maybe,</em> said a tiny voice in the back of Steve’s mind, one he usually tried to ignore, <em>he would if you made the first move. </em></p>
<p>	Pushing back the blankets with a sigh, Steve did his best to shift into the bed without disturbing Tony. Even so, Tony grumbled and woke at the movement, reminding Steve of just how light a sleeper Tony typically was. </p>
<p>	“Babe?” Tony mumbled, reaching out blindly in the dark. “Steve, is everything okay?” </p>
<p>	“Yeah,” Steve said, trying to keep his tone light. “Just needed some air.” He pulled Tony toward him, trying to make out his face in the dim strip of light coming from beneath the door. Squinting against the dark, Tony followed Steve’s tugs and shimmied across the bed toward him. </p>
<p>	“Okay,” Tony murmured, kneeling beside him as Steve climbed into the bed. “Are you sure?” His expression deepened to concern as he reached up to caress Steve’s face with both hands. </p>
<p>	“Yes,” Steve whispered, letting Tony run his thumbs gently across the planes of his cheeks. He closed his eyes, reveling in the tenderness of the moment. “I love you.” </p>
<p>	Tony simply kissed Steve in response, long and deep. There were many unspoken words in the kiss — words Steve knew Tony wanted to say, but didn’t have the strength or the bravery to yet. So, Steve reciprocated in turn, trying to tell Tony he understood, even as the guilt at his own secrets grew. When the kiss broke, Steve dragged Tony in to rest against his chest, cradling him against his side. His thoughts trailed back to the conversation he’d had with Nat only moments ago. Wouldn’t it be best to just tell Tony his past? He’d half admitted he’d been with men before, so where was the real risk? Even as Steve opened his mouth to begin speaking, the words caught in his throat. Something had to be shared. Steve knew he would feel better letting Tony in now than keeping him out until it was too late to change tack. Looking down at the brunet tucked against his side, he took in for a moment all the changes his life had thrown at him, and processed the good fortune he’d received to be loved so fully by someone he’d never expected. </p>
<p>	There were fine lines framing Tony’s eyes, which were soft with relaxation, though not closed. Tony’s fingers danced across Steve’s chest, tracing slow, gentle circles in the grey fabric of his t-shirt. Those brown eyes that Steve thought he could just fall into crinkled with a smile as Tony looked up to catch Steve staring. </p>
<p>	“What?” Tony asked, sitting up on one of his elbows. Shaking his head, Steve brushed his fingers down the side of Tony’s face, grazing his thumb over his unshaven jaw as he continued to think. </p>
<p>	“Nothing,” Steve replied softly. “Just thinking.” </p>
<p>	“What about?” </p>
<p>	“How I wish things were different,” Steve said with a groan, pulling Tony back down to his chest. “Sometimes I wish that we weren’t Iron Man and Captain America, just Steve and Tony.” Tony chuckled and rested his chin on Steve’s chest. </p>
<p>	“Who would protect me from the big-bad-wolf if I didn’t have you?” Tony asked, a little bit of sarcasm dripping off his tongue. </p>
<p>	“Good point,” Steve muttered, rolling so he was hovering over Tony, framing the smaller man’s head between his elbows, pinning him in. “What if I wanted to be the big-bad-wolf, though?” </p>
<p>	“You can be whatever you want, baby.” Wrapping his hands around the back of Steve’s neck, he pulled him into a kiss. It wasn’t hard or fast or needy like it sometimes was, just a soft meshing of their lips opening into the wet warmth of tongues and mouths. Steve groaned pleasurably, and while he so wanted to get carried away in Tony, the exhaustion he’d felt before bed was overtaking him again, and he knew they both had work to do in the morning. Pulling back, he watched Tony for a long moment, settled there on top of him, body between his legs, wishing they had nowhere to be and nothing to do and that he could just fall into him over and over forever. Placing one last soft kiss on Tony’s forehead, he rolled off onto his own side of the bed and pulled the blankets over them. Tucking back in, Tony kissed Steve’s neck a few times before sighing contentedly. </p>
<p>	“Sleep, my love,” Steve whispered, curling around Tony as much as he could. </p>
<p>	“I’ll keep the nightmares away, big-bad-wolf,” Tony replied with a small laugh. Chuckling, Steve tried to push away his feelings of guilt. Trying to avoid them was obviously pointless, but needlessly stressful right now. There was always tomorrow. </p>
<p>#</p>
<p>	A hand on Steve’s shoulder roused him from a still uneasy sleep. Turning over while trying again not to wake Tony, he was surprised to see Nat, her face a furious mask. They’d gone to bed in good spirits the night before, even after their strained and awkward conversation about love and feelings, so this anger was unexpected and more than a little concerning. She waved him from bed and for the second time that morning, Steve found himself trying to keep from waking Tony as he slipped from the room. Rushing down the stairs, Steve didn’t ask what the hurry was about, or where her anger had come from, sure he’d see it for himself soon enough. The hall they walked down was still, save for the muffled sounds of movement coming from the conference room, and the sound of their socked feet on the cold stone. As the two closed in on the sounds of rising excitement, Nat paused, putting a hand on Steve’s arm to stop him.</p>
<p>	“Promise me you’ll keep your cool,” Nat said. As Steve opened his mouth to protest, Nat reached up and prodded him hard in the chest. “Promise.” </p>
<p>	“Fine,” Steve said, feeling more trepidation than he had before. </p>
<p>	“After you, then,” she said, gesturing toward the din of the conference room. Stepping forward, Steve’s heart fell into his stomach at the sight of the face filling the large screen in the back of the room. Words were coming out of Rhodes mouth, but all Steve could hear was the rush of blood in his ears like static. Rumlow. After months of searching, tracking down every HYDRA base and turning in countless HYDRA agents, he was the only one to elude them for almost two years, other than Bucky. Steve was positive Rumlow’s goal had never been trying to hide or bring HYDRA back from the dead again. He was positive the goal had always been distraction; distraction for Steve, for the Avengers, for everything. The only thing Steve felt sure of when it came to Rumlow was how much he hated that absolute piece of —</p>
<p>	“Rogers!” Nat said, jabbing Steve in the side hard enough to pull him from his anger induced trance. </p>
<p>	“What?” Steve asked, grimacing as he clutched the spot in his side.</p>
<p>	“We’re counting on you right now to lead this. Can you handle it?” Asked Rhodes. Steve's instinct was to be offended; of course he could handle it. After the immediate insult wore off, though, Steve realized there was no malice in his tone, just concern. I can take the lead, if you need to step back. </p>
<p>	“No,” said Steve quickly. “This is my fight.” Nodding, Rhodes paused before flicking to the next slide. With Rumlow’s face gone, Steve took a moment to look around the room. So far, the only one he hadn’t yet seen was Sam, who’s eyes were carefully trained on Steve; when the locked gazes, Sam gave Steve an inconspicuous thumbs up, which Steve returned. </p>
<p>	“I have to go wake Tony up,” Steve muttered to Nat, turning from the monitor. “He’ll want to be a part of this.” Before Steve could leave, Nat caught his arm and looked at him, scanning over his face. There was more in her gaze than simply quiet contemplation, but it wasn’t something Steve was ready to face yet. </p>
<p>	“Will you find Wanda and Vision, too? May as well have the whole team here,” Nat said, watching his expression carefully. Steve managed to keep his face blank, simply nodding as he pulled away from her. Hurrying down the hall, he got all the way to the stairs before he had to stop to take a calming breath. Everything was crashing down in his mind right now, overwhelming and intense in ways he hadn’t known he could feel. Sitting on the stairs for a moment, he wondered how he could be so preoccupied by his relationship with Tony that he let everything else melt away. That he’d let anything distract from his goal of permanently eradicating HYDRA hurt almost as much as the years he’d spent without Bucky. Beyond thinking he was dead, he’d let Bucky waste away in HYDRA’s clutches, without even trying to find his body. He should’ve told someone to look. </p>
<p>	That ice was a mistake. </p>
<p>	Pulling Steve out of the ice was a mistake. </p>
<p>	Shaking the thoughts away, Steve stood and climbed the stairs two at a time, walking briskly down the hall to his bedroom. The bed was empty when he entered, and he could hear the tap shut off when he entered. The bathroom door clicked open, and Tony shuffled out, looking exhausted. The bags beneath his eyes had deepened, and he blinked blearily at Steve, rubbing sleep from his face as a small smile tried to take over. Once he got a good look at the stiff nature of Steve’s stature, his blank, emotionless face, however, Tony’s smile dropped. </p>
<p>	“Are you okay?” Tony asked, stepping into wrap his arms around Steve’s torso. Stiffening against the touch, Steve nodded and drew himself away, placing his hands on Tony’s wrists and withdrawing in a way that made the concern deepen across Tony’s expression. </p>
<p>	“Get dressed,” Steve said, words tight and tone impatient. “Rumlow’s been spotted. Meet us in the conference room.” He didn’t wait for Tony to respond, just stalked from the room and turned toward Wanda’s room. It wasn’t fare to take his frustration at himself out on Tony — Steve knew that. Part of him wanted to pout, though, and he was leaning into that. Even before he was given this… gift of strength and longevity, he’d never been one for self-pity. Maybe it was the time period he’d grown up in, or just the nature of being sickly and small while a war was raging. Steve knew he had to calm down before he got to Wanda’s room, though. They barely knew each other still, and after everything they went through in Sokovia… slowing his pace, Steve backed against a wall, crouching low onto his heels. The cool stone of the hall brought Steve back to reality. If he was going to instill confidence in his team, he couldn’t do that in pieces, and he certainly couldn’t face Rumlow in the state he was in. </p>
<p>	Any distraction would get someone killed, and he had every reason to want to live now, more than ever. It was only a few moments later that Steve managed to pull himself together, resolving to keep his temper under control and figure out what he was going to do. With more purpose than before, he stood and walked to Wanda’s room. </p>
<p>	“Steve?” Wanda answered the door a couple minutes after he’d knocked in her bathrobe, one shoulder slipping down to reveal her bare skin. Still in a state of bleary half-sleep, she rubbed her eyes and cleared her throat. She’d only just opened the door enough to see him, but pulled it further open and leaned against the doorjamb. “Is something wrong?” </p>
<p>	“Sort of,” Steve said with a nod, trying to avoid her eyes. It had been nearly a year since Sokovia, but Steve could still barely look at her. “Is—” he paused, trying to avoid any awkward questions. “There’s a meeting in the conference room, and I’d like it if everyone was there. Can you get dressed and meet us down there? Bring Vision, if you can find him.” </p>
<p>	“No worries,” Wanda said, reaching out to place a hand on Steve’s forearm, “we’ll be there soon.” Steve nodded and gave a thin lipped smile as Wanda backed up and closed the door behind her. Guilt bubbled in his chest again as he started back toward the stairs through the resident hall. Slowly, he stopped in front of his bedroom, creeping the door open to peer in. Tony was sitting on the bed still, socks in hand, a frown on his face. </p>
<p>	“Did I do something?” Tony asked. The tension in the room was palpable as Steve moved quickly forward to kneel in front of Tony. </p>
<p>	“No,” Steve said. “Love, no, I’m sorry. I got frustrated and I didn’t want to be comforted.” His hands settled on Tony’s thighs; when their eyes met, Steve noticed Tony’s were red rimmed and wet A sigh of grief rushed from Steve as he rubbed his hands up and down the soft material of Tony’s slacks. “I’m sorry, really.” </p>
<p>	“It’s my job to comfort you, dummy. I love you.” At the sound of those words, Steve couldn’t contain himself. A wicked grin spread across his face, job done just by the simple sound of Tony saying it aloud. Rolling his eyes, Tony dragged Steve to his feet. “Come on, we’ve got a thing and this is no time for you to get excited.” </p>
<p>	“They can wait,” Steve whispered, leaning in close. Tony moved his face away, putting one hand flat on Steve’s chest. </p>
<p>	“You don’t just get to come in here and apologize and think I’ll let you have your way with me after,” Tony muttered, winking devilishly. He shooed Steve toward his dresser. “Get dressed and we’ll see about them waiting later.” A few minutes later, Tony was dragging Steve behind him into the conference room. </p>
<p>	“Okay, the meeting can start, your kings have arrived,” Tony said dramatically. Laughter erupted and Nat caught Steve’s eye. </p>
<p>	“Kings?” she mouthed, shaking her head. Leaning in close, Nat whispered to Steve under the pretense of looking at the map on the table. “If he’s not a queen, I’ll eat my shoe.” Glaring, Steve sat in the chair next to Tony as Rhodes shot an annoyed glance at them both. Flipping back a few slides, Rhodes waited for Wanda and Vision to rush in, taking their own places at the table before going through what he knew, then giving the floor up to Steve.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Update, Announcement, Preview!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Hi friends!</p><p>It's me, Isabel, also known on here as O, Ollie or Izzie. I'm just here with a little update to this story. As I'm currently in school and my workload is enormous, I feel like it's irresponsible to spend any more time on this than I have free (and trust me, all I think about in my free time is this story). I'm gonna keep slowly working on it, editing the chapters I have, adding bits and pieces into my word document here and there, but I can't give any of you the guarantee that this will be updated any time soon. The soonest we're looking at for an update is probably close to the beginning of July. If in the off chance it won't be updated then, I'll edit this chapter when that time comes. Until then, I have a couple announcements.</p><p>Number 1: I'm currently in the middle of writing an epistolary story surrounding Bucky from 1930 to the end of The Falcon and the Winter Soldier. For any of you who don't know what kind of story that is, it's one that's predominantly written in letters, messages, or journal entries. The chapters are usually very short (as in, less than 1,500 words a piece), and that's the perfect thing for me to work on as a wind down at the end of my day. Life is crazy stressful, so having something to focus my attention on that isn't all that nonsense will be great.</p><p>Number 2: This story -- Civil Heart -- will be split into three parts due to length. After over a year of consideration on this story, I made the realization that this story will end up being close to 70 chapters long if I leave it all in one piece. For the sake of my sanity, your patience, and everyones enjoyment, it'll be a trilogy installment with short one shots for scenes that don't necessarily fit in anywhere. I hope that makes sense (heh), everything is a work in progress right now.</p><p>And now, for the thing you've been waiting for.</p><p>Here is a brief preview of what chapter four is going to bring us. I hope you enjoy. Don't forget to subscribe to the story and to me if you want to keep up with the cool stuff dropping. Leaving kudos helps boost the story, and please feel free to comment and let me know what you think, what you want to see next, and where you think we're going with this. Much love to all of you.</p><p><em>Preview</em>: Chapter Four</p><p>"Do you think I should be coming with you?" Steve asked, grimacing through the question. </p><p>Nat watched Steve for a moment with narrowed eyes. Padding into the kitchen, she leaned back against the counter beside Steve. </p><p>"You have history with Rumlow. You know his mind, the way he thinks... I think without you, it would be a different fight." The pause she took filled the room, and Steve couldn't break it. All he wanted was an answer -- a clear and decisive yes or no. Instead, he felt just as lost as he had when Tony asked if he was the right one. The answer she gave didn't help to reassure him. In fact, it was doing quite the opposite, biting up Steve's nerves and carrying on that hyper-anxious energy he'd faced in the conference room. </p><p>"To put it into simpler words for my favorite senior citizen, I think we'd be lost without you." Nat smiled and gently squeezed Steve's arm. "You can do this. And even if you can't, we'll be there the whole time." </p><p>"Thanks," Steve said through a little laugh. Sighing, he rolled his shoulders and stood up straight, looking at the sink still full of dishes before clearing his throat. "I guess I should get ready to go." </p><p>"Yeah," Nat said with a wink. "You only have two hours to say goodbye to your boyfriend." </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I keep you in my hearts, always. Love you 3000.</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed the story. If you did, go ahead and give it a subscribe, or even bookmark it for later. Leaving kudos and comments are always helpful, and go a long way to helping me become a better writer. I'm not super active on it right now, but you can follow me here: <a href="https://thedemonledger.tumblr.com">Tumblr</a> and on my <a href="https://olliedoeseverything.blogspot.com/">Blog</a>. Have a great day everyone!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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